Often Teachers Feel Unsupported; How a Person Handles a Situation Makes the Difference

You see, no one has control over another person’s actions. There is no one way that works 100 percent of the time to stop a bully.

Teachers can feel helpless when it comes to behavior in their classroom.  Last spring I had a very well respected teacher say to me, “I became a teacher to teach, not to discipline.”  I understand the frustration this teacher feels.  In order to be good at any job, we must acknowledge unwanted obstacles…things that are not the way they are supposed to be.   In my mind, there are 2 options:

  1. Fighting those obstacles                                                                                                      
  2. Addressing the obstacles and working towards fixing them.

In my experience, fixing those obstacles is the easiest and fastest way to get the job done.

I wanted to share a comment a teacher wrote on one of my blogs, as well as my response.

Shaista Ghaffar

Teacher at Peel Board of Education

Toronto, Canada Area

“Cyberbullying/Bullying is not a problem among the students, there are teachers who are bullied by the students. Last June two of my colleagues took stress leave because they were constantly bullied by their students. The administrators did nothing to help the teachers”.

My response:  Shaista, Thank you for your comments.  You are correct in saying that there are some teachers who are bullied by students and correct about saying that many times people who are being bullied feel helpless and unsupported.

In my experience, administrators do things that they believe to be the right course of action.  It is typical that the other teachers, students and parents are not privy to the course of action that the administrator has taken.  Students say that to me all the time, “Ms. Brown, that kid bullies and the school does nothing.”  It is not that the school did nothing but it is just not appropriate to share the consequences with the entire school community.

The other things I see often are:

The school takes the actions they think are appropriate but those actions do not correct the bullying behavior.  You see, no one has control over another person’s actions.  There is no one way that works 100% of the time to stop a bully.

One of the most common things I see is that the school administrators (or teachers in the matter of kids being bullied in the classroom)  don’t know what to do to correct the problem!

I have spent  1000′s of hours teaching administrators and teachers strategies to create and maintain a positive school climate.  In order to create that, and before you will have success in stopping the bullying, you have to know how to address mean, negative and hurtful behavior.  You have to address the small stuff first. Our programs are simple and they work!

Jill Brown


This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

PaulRevere September 14, 2012 at 09:16 PM
No one would write a $10,000 check to send their child to public schools. Our Public schools need an overhaul and massive changes in standards. Once Teachers and School Boards demand parents adhere to a schedule of rules, the students might respond. It is wrong for those parents teaching their children "morals" and respect at home to have a minority force lower standards. We all suffered Live-bullying back many years ago. It was private school and was handled very quiclkly. Today's bullying is no different. (online-or offline). My Solution: Once our school's teachers recognize any student out of line, should lead to dismissal. It cost society now around $10,000 per child to get educated in Public schools. That is too big a cost to keep making excuses. If these claims by our teachers do not get attention and resolved, I would wonder Why, society should continue to support one size fits ALL public school education system. Taxpayers who do not use public schools whould be wise to question how teachers in private schools could control their children, while Public school teachers constantly have many reasons (excuses) why they cannot really (TEACH). Why they claim to be Baby-sitters. Sounds like I hear good reasons to question the enormous pay schedules that we all pay Public school teachers. This article provides sufficient reasons to question the Quality of "Taught" education by our public schools. Baby-sitters come at a much cheaper cost than "educators".
CreveCoeurDad September 14, 2012 at 10:21 PM
A. If I had to pay $20K per year to send my two kids to Ladue, I would. Pretty much a bargain compared to the $40K MICDS or $50K JBS would cost. Therefore, you are completely and utterly wrong, and someone just said they would pay. B. Obviously you haven't hired any baby sitters or sent your kids to daycare lately. $10K a year for 8 hours a day, even if you just count the school year, would not hire anyone of quality or anyone who could drive. C. You think bullying doesn't happen in private schools and kids aren't punished? Puhlleeeze! What world do you live in? Kids with money get away with crap like bullying all the time. Heck, if you've got enough money and connections, Ladue private school kids can even kill someone and only get slapped with a misdemeanor. Public school kids are limited to stealing beer from neighbors refrigerators. <remove tongue from cheek - but it's somewhat based on fact>
RDBet September 15, 2012 at 02:29 AM
I wouldn't take "PaulRevere" too seriously.
PaulRevere September 15, 2012 at 05:14 PM
CreveDad: Strange how you say "If I had to pay $20K". I would say, Why don't you? Non-public K-12's in SLCounty,Fenton,Affton,Mehlville,Lindbergh,SunsetHills,Crestwood, etc have hundreds of non-public schools with tuitions averaging $6,000 per year. You used MICDS and JBS, NOT ME. (quite unfair to my point) I could care less that You love the public school system, (your choice) (Maybe you are financially dependent on their road to "taxing the Heck out of" 100% of their districts.) If so, then please state that. My comments suggested that public school COSTs are out of control. Teacher complaints with no solutions is absurd. The only reason they can exist is to "Force" everyone pay. (IN THE NAME OF EDUCATION). A: Go ahead and PAY the $20K rather than forcing others to share in Your child's education. The mere fact that you can afford $20,000 proves my point. You sir: ARE ONE WHO CAN AFFORD TO SEND YOUR CHILD TO ANY SCHOOL YOU CHOOSE. You are the freeloader expecting others to pay "twice" for Education. Put your money where your keyboard is, and write (contribute) your $20,000 Fair share to our public school system that is out of control. Buy your own auditoriums and sports stadiums with your own money. Buy your own "union pay scales" for a job that can be done for half the cost. Public ed is in shambles. I am convinced , it's destroying financial lives of many. What exactly does Taxing our autos, our home values have to do with education?
PaulRevere September 15, 2012 at 05:46 PM
Follow up to CreveDad C) Bullying does happen in non-public schools -I did not however elaborate how we parents handled that, Because you can't handle my method. It's not PC. B) Obviously , you do not understand My baby-sitter comment. It really has nothing to do with Cost. It was "irony" Finally, I intend to push forward on improving our Public schools. Hopefully, to reduce society's $10K annual cost. Our Public schools are going the cost route of Post offices. Lesson of Teacher complaints without solving the problems themselves will result in people corrections they will all lament. Fed Ex and UPS (both private) are the same as non-public (private) schools vs Public schools. Make no mistake about that. If you are not a teacher , then I am amazed that you are adamant about reducing public school costs for ALL. This article should be a Warning! What used to be a "public school is FREE" mentality is WRONG. Public schools now cost more than 90% of non-public environment schools, It is because of the many "non-education" add-ons. You and I and your neighbors are getting "Ripped" off by our public school funding systems. The lack of responsibility, dress codes, uniformity, morals, and discipline are now severe. My full support of public school has waned tremendously as I now witness the Cost vs. benefits vs. alternatives that far exceed what society can afford. Home forclosures are living proof of the poor and needy not affording to pay their School taxes.
CreveCoeurDad September 15, 2012 at 07:24 PM
He does tend to rant, and not too coherently. Brevity is not his strong suit. The sad thing is, he and I could agree on a lot, but since it's all or nothing with him, I guess that means it's nothing. Yet another extremist who doesn't realize the art of politics is building coalitions.
PaulRevere September 15, 2012 at 09:13 PM
MrCreveCourD: I am encouraged that we could "agree on a lot". What is so "sad" about that? Brevity is always trumped by message. Labelling me and pointing out my shortfalls are not the problem in our Public Schools. That is why brevity would never work. P.S. I have been and always will support 100% public education for anyone earning under $40,000 per year. Is that extremist? The plight of our public schools is grave. They are severe, and will only get worse , if left in the hands of reluctant boards. Solar panel installations are the ultimate thumb in our face. Economically, our public schools are on the road to major Federal tax subsidies COSTING billions for even non-residents of school districts. That is why Brevity turns into Rant. I have no time for spell check and grammar at this time. Trust me, that will come later.
Susan B. Anthony September 16, 2012 at 01:22 PM
It has already been pointed out to Mr. Revere that public education is funded by taxes and that he doesn't get to opt out. And that I do not want to pay for his private "schools". Mr. Trudeau's comical strip today gave me a chuckle. http://doonesbury.slate.com/strip/archive/2012/09/16
PaulRevere September 16, 2012 at 06:01 PM
SusanB: What is being funded is: (Everything, BUT Education) Union Dues, Pension plans, 3 month vacations, medical plans, Auditoriums, sports teams, swimming pools, solar panel billion dollar federal grants, and finally the last 25cents goes for our Children. Now that's "education" funding in Missouri. What has been pointed out to you, susanB, is that "I AM NOT asking to opt out". You are not forced to pay for any private school. If there were no competition with public schools , than I have no choice. But, you hate competition, don't you? I want to pay for my kids Education at the school of my choice. Even the President exempts me paying his medical TAX.(because I can CHOOSE my own health ins.) RIGHT? You do agree with the Pres. I want my Tax portion to go for my Education of choice. Why don't we force all residents to "support ALL education systems". Does that scare you? Do you not advocate "Fair Share?" Is Public education, the best out there? Do you want to keep all residents paying $10,000 per student Public education or are you scared to let them have a choice to pay $6,000. A PARENTS CHOICE! What started as an education for the needy and poor has turned into a "UNION-STATE Education system". It's broke, and you must be an educator, otherwise you would be "FOR" reducing taxpayer Taxes , Not increasing them. My program reduces taxes for all residents. Unfortunatly, for you, once the residents see the light, they will all vote their wallets.


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